messy

so, here are the hard wood floors in our new house. yeah, the "new house" posts are pretty heavy on the kid side, huh?!

i'm used to keeping a neat, orderly house. not because that is my nature, but because it is our livelihood. well, right now? neat and orderly are a far cry from here. the laundry is finally done, but neatly piled on our bed. i REALLY hope that i can get to it before we want to sleep tonight. because, if not? messy piles all over the floor.

there is a smashed cracker on the floor by the stairs. i have walked past it numerous times today. it makes me want to yell. for no reason other than the fact that it makes me feel out of control. i don't want yell. i'm not a yeller. i talk myself out of it knowing that sweeping it up after dinner would be the most time efficient. and a deep breath much more efficient than a exasperating yell.

there are piles of things to be carried on the stairs. THAT is when i really know it is bad. when stuff piles on counters or stairs, i know i'm in over my head. i usually carry as i go throughout the day. today, it seems too big to even do that.

is this dramatic? ABSOLUTELY. i rarely worry about these things. there are MUCH more important things going on in the world, in my town, in my home, than if my counters are gleaming.

so, we've taken a break. to play. to color. to get coffee. to go to the library. to deliver a meal. to work on papers to get our babies home. to forward our babies orphanage's newsletter.

to spread the word.....that the world is so much bigger than our tiny "problems." forget that pile of dishes. a baby was just left. malnourished. crying. starving. to death. in a dumpster. simply because his mom hoped that someone could find him....and feed him. maybe that person is me. or you.

[you can find our adoption fund-raising t-shirts and necklace post here]