big brother.
one of the biggest surprises in adoption for our family has been the
realization of just how much clayton and bianca needed a big brother.
how precious that He had one planned for them even if they were 3 years old
when he came home to them. anyone that has been around nico and younger
children can tell you how great he is with them. he is so much fun with them,
yet he is also a cool, calm, strong presence for them. he can calmly get
our 3 year olds out of just about any fit they may be having at any time.
it's amazing. and, boy, do these 2 look up to him. clayton needed a big brother
to wrestle and to try to help him stay out of trouble. [smile]
bianca needed one who adores her & loves to play. he does.
soon after this picture, he even broke concentration to wave to his 3 year old
little sister who was chanting, ni-CO, ni-CO, ni-CO!
i have people message me about older child adoption & i'm happy to
talk about it with you. [i fully admit that i'm behind on messages &
am sorry--hope you all understand.] what i tell most people though is that
it is not for everyone. that they are wise to seek out people that have gone
before them & they need to continue to do that. they need to hear the good
and the bad. educate yourself as much as possible--from others, but also
about the child. knowing as much as you can about their history, demeanor,
personality, etc can make a big difference in figuring out how they will
work in your family. meeting and spending time with them makes a big difference.
i remind them that certain things will forever change
i remind them that certain things will forever change
about your family. some of the things that have had to change, i grieve, but
it is nothing compared to what has changed for the positive.
for us, i know that this is absolutely where each of us is meant to be.
if you are feeling that about an older child, please know that it is possible.
it is hard work. there is struggle. it will take time, love & a whole
lot of patience. for some, it is downright awful for moments, days, weeks & years.
yet, being part of His plan for a child to feel love & know redemption?
it is a blessing.
it is worth it.
they are worth it.
our sweet 'older' boys are treasures. i'm so, so thankful they are home.
Love this. Thank you for sharing your heart + for the encouragement to other families! You write about your kids with so much peace and grace. Beautiful. :)
ReplyDeletethis brought me to tears! the way you're able to write things out for us to read is something special! i love how you speak so highly of your children and admit that things aren't always easy but always worth it! thank you for sharing your heart and for being honest!
ReplyDeleteWhoa baby... Amen to all of the above. We have seen this in our kids...but having 7 kids ( and you surely know this) I have seen that each kid comes with their own bag of unique struggles and success'...
ReplyDeleteLove reading others thoughts on adoption...
T
I am so thankful that families like yours adopt older children! we are strongly considering adopting a child (not baby) in the coming years and I need to remember that it is possible. The negative information is everywhere, we don't need more of that, we need hope :)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for answering my questions!! We are still praying and seeking God about the posibility.
ReplyDeleteBlessings to you for sharing wisdom from your experiences!
Amy
When I showed this to Gloria and Joshua they said at the exact same time, "I bet Nico is really goooooood!" Wish we could come watch your sweet boys play soccer and meet the rest of your family:)
ReplyDeleteWe have been seriously considering adoption of an "older" child. When our youngest, now 18 months, is a little older, we shall see what God does. It does my heart wonders to even thi about it.
ReplyDelete*think
DeleteAmen. Love this!
ReplyDeleteAs an adoptee, thank you. We nees mothers like you.
ReplyDelete