answers.

Okay--here are the answers to the questions you all asked in the post right below this one.  I'm
so thankful to be able to share some of our journey with you!  I love hearing from you.  Your
support and love is amazing.  Thank you!!

Do people assume that you adopted because you had all girls and wanted a boy?

YES.  Actually, that's funny because the nurse asked that, too and I forgot to include it.  People
are usually very surprised when we answer, "No, we actually didn't specify gender."  We were completely open to God's will for our child....boy or girl.

Is it true that we can't adopt internationally because we already have 5 children?

It is going to take a little more research, but it is totally possible.   I would research through the
internet, social workers that do home studies and adoption agencies.  Also, often it is the agency
that has these requirements, not the country.  So, researching different agencies makes a difference,
too. Offhand, I know the 4 countries we considered don't have family size requirements (except
for money earned.)  Those were the U.S., Ug@nda, Ethiopi@ & Cong0. (and technically
the Cong0 has one, but it is relatively easy to get that rule waived.)  It can definitely be done!

What are your favorite flavors of jelly bellies?

Hands down Cotton Candy.  Then?  Pear & Peach!

Was it difficult to make the kids you already had understand what was going to happen and 
why, and to make them love Clayton the same as an actual brother? Or did it just come easy 
for them?  Was it a hard/stressful topic the first time?

Interesting.  I've never thought of this, really.  It really was just so natural to them when we
began discussing it.  Maybe because we talk about things like orphans and poverty fairly often.
It was pretty much a natural extension for them.  {There are kids that don't have homes or that 
don't have families?!  Well, we could be their family.}  We are somewhat careful about images we
show them, but we do show them truth.  They have seen pictures of the slums in parts of Africa, of malnourished children and of children in tattered clothing eating their posho.  We often get asked by them when we can bring our next child home!
As far as did they love him as an "actual brother".... they don't see it as anything else!  Kids have
no reference for that.  He is their brother and although the ride home from the airport was tough, as
he screamed the whole time, i'm pretty certain that a newborn coming home from the hospital could make an older sibling wonder what in the world was going on, too!!

How do I feel about domestic adoption?

I feel like it is a wonderful option that is a blessing to many.  I'm so thankful that we're all called to different things.  Just like we all can't be teachers or lawyers or designers.....we are gifted in
different areas with different callings.  Anytime a child that needs a home and family is given one,
it is a blessing.  {and NOT just to the child!}

How long did it take from the time you 1st began the process until you had Clay in your 
arms and AT HOME?

We began our home study in February 2009 and Clayton was HOME in November 2009.
(9 months!)

How does this work financially?

This seems to be what holds most people back.  Every country is different.  {With the US foster
system it is virtually fee free!}  There are interest free loans.  There are grants.  There is fund-raising
and budget cutting.  In the end, it is a ransom.  A ransom to bring your child home.

How did you decide where to adopt from?

We've both always had a love for Africa.  We just began researching countries, agencies and
scoured the internet for people that had gone before us.  It is very hard to explain, but upon looking
at the pictures on this lady's blog, I felt an instant connection to that country.  I was in love.  I
showed Matt and he instantly said, "OK! What do we do?!"

Was there resistance from your lawyers/social workers due to the fact that you already had 
4 children?

No, it was never brought up as an issue at all.

You say that you're planning on adopting at least 1 more child.  Do you know where you 
want to adopt from already?

We're still praying about that.  We're hoping to know SOON!  We are open to anything, including
the countries that I mentioned we considered in the 2nd question of this post!

Is there anything that you'll do differently this next time?

Hmm...I guess that depends on where we adopt from.  As far as preparing our family and the
transition once our child is home, no.

How many hoops were there to jump through and how long did it take?

It really depends what country you go with and if you use an agency or not.  Those are the
biggest decisions to figure out.  I would've jumped through 87 more hoops to bring our boy home.
It took a total of 9 months start to finish.  But, from the time I first met Clay until I brought him
home....2 months!

How do you respond to the question, "Why not adopt one of the many children in need 
of a home right here in your own country?"

This can be so touchy.  My human flesh wants to ask them how many children they've adopted domestically.  Because the truth is, if someone has a heart for orphans and for children who need
love, they should know that ALL children need it and they should REJOICE when ANY child
finds their forever family.

BUT,

I don't answer with my human fleshly answer.  I usually say that we are open to domestic adoption
if we feel called there, but God had our child waiting for us in Africa.  If the conversation continues,
they hear a lot about how I believe we are one world and that everyone has a different purpose.

Will you show me one more picture of your boy in that stud shirt because he is absolutely 
edible and I can't imagine how you ever lived your life without him?  

Okay, fine.