hopeful.

oh, our sweet bianca. my goodness is she loved!

i need to be honest with you. well, i'm ALWAYS honest with you, but i guess i need to
say something that is hard for me to say here. i don't want to sound ungrateful or unsatisfied
or inconsiderate. i don't think i'm any of those things, but my heart....the very deepest part of it....
knows that bianca isn't our last baby.

YES, we have 5 children. YES, they are ages six and under. YES, it is [sometimes] crazy,
loud & a lot of work. YES, i realize how badly some people long for even one child.
 [i am praying for YOU.]

is it possible to be content, yet know that there is something else coming for you, too? i am
definitely a lover of teeny-tiny babies, but that isn't the ONLY reason. i know babies grow. i
WANT another weeble-wobbler walker, another boundary-testing 3 year old, another
 learning-the-world-is-bigger-than-just-me 6 year old, YES EVEN another
 these-are-hard-years teenager. i want to set another place at the table
for our 6th [and 7th & 8th?!] child's family
 to come home to when they're grown.

our children are treasures. i enjoy them and love them so much & they are the only
gifts that we get to take with us forever. it's not that our other 5 children
aren't enough. it is the exact opposite. they are so much that i can't imagine
 saying no to loving another child.

i don't know if this desire will ever go away, but as long as we have room in our
hearts and our home....i don't really care. my heart is ready. i hope
 that my "home" is soon to follow.

my laptop is at the doctor.  i hope she is well soon.  until then, i have no editing software & it is very hard to do anything. well, except
laundry and weeding flower beds.  i was very good at that today.  = )